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Tuesday, October 29, 2013

I Didn't Believe in Soul Mates Until I Bared My Soul

I have always said that I don't believe in a soul mate - and I still don't think a person is destined to find "The One" who will magically connect with every unspoken desire and be available, never needy, always uplifting.  No, that isn't real. 

What I am realizing is that the more vulnerable I am willing to be, the more known I feel by my husband and then the more connected.  It's such a sweet and amazing phenomenon that I've only experienced in the slightest way so far.  From the start Mr. Wonderful has been such a safe person for me - I have never felt threatened and this security allows me to open up and to be known fully.  I hope I provide the same gentle place for his soul. 

It is this baring of the souls where I find the connection that I think others describe as being soul mate.  The mating isn't instantaneous or mystical, it is unfolding and methodical but no less intoxicating for its participants.  I think this is the attribute not celebrated in the soul mate discussion - one must actively participate in the back and forth disrobing of self, risking exposure and baring the true self. 

One must also be the safe place for another.  There will be disappointments, let downs, crossed intentions and moments of weakness, even sin.  These traits lurk in all human and in accepting these of our spouse, love wins.  I always said that I didn't believe in soul mates, but now I do.  I didn't believe in soul mates until I bared my soul and found acceptance, found comfort, affection and love.

Inspired by These Articles: Why My Husband is My Soul Mate and My Husband Is Not My Soul Mate