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Wednesday, July 12, 2017

The Beauty of A Summer Bucket List for the Working Mama

Somewhere early this summer, I read about a summer bucket list and freedom.  The article gave permission to not do it all, but do what you really want and it freed me from the working mom guilt I sometimes carry.  During the school year, I don't worry too much about being in the office each day.  I'm beyond blessed to clock-out in time for school pick-up lines.  But during the summer, I long for lazy days with my crew and imagine what it would be like to not go to work each day.  Sometimes the longing isn't as much working mom guilt, but working mom jealousy.  My children seem totally fine without me...I'm the one who wishes things could be different.

But, instead of wishing for what cannot be, I've prioritized what I want to do.  Some people create elaborate lists of adventures, but I kept mine succinct and doable.  One of the things on our list was for my oldest guy and I to hike Mount LeConte.  In our area, it's a reputable hike and rite of passage. We accomplished our goal this week and it was just the best!

Hiking has long been a shared activity for us, and for the family in general. So it was natural to set out together.  This is our longest hike so far.  It was strenuous, but not terrible and I was intentional about allowing us to take our time, rest as needed and make it fun.  On previous hikes, I've been guilty of pushing too hard or pressing too quickly.  I let my guy take the lead often and set the pace.

We had wonderful conversations, the kind that just don't happen unless you have many hours together without distractions.  My bucket lists aren't about spending all the time together, that's just not possible and I'm learning it's actually great for my maturing children.  I'm seeking intentional one-on-one time and creating a general feeling of availability.  So when I'm able, I'm all-in.

I've got a few more "bucket-list" items that will provide ample one-on-one time with my children.  But most of our summer list items are just keeping things relaxed, calm, and a big break from the routine. Sleeping in.  Screen Breaks.  Swimming (learning to dive).  Snow Cones and Sparklers are part of our wishes.  So far, it's going great!

So if you, like me, aren't with your children all-day, all-summer long, then know that it's totally alright!  Pick the moments you want to share and make the best of them.  The rest of the time, be proud that you're providing for all the moments when you're not there, and giving them people and experiences that will only add to their lives.