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Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Flawed but Forgiven

It makes such a difference - I'm so very flawed and every single day a few of those flaws show their ugly selves.  It's tempting to see my flaws and focus on my shortcomings.  Thankfully, I'm so forgiven!  On my own, I will always fall short.  Short of my own expectations, short of what others want from me.  But standing with Christ, I will be enough.  In Him there is no condemnation.  None.  Ever.

Last night I was not able to be excited about something that my spouse wanted.  I could tell I disappointed him and I do not want to disappoint him.  Many times in the past, I stuffed my feelings about something to be the "Yes," girl and support someone else.  I'm learning to be more truthful in my responses and to allow myself to be real.  In doing so, it seems I let another down.  It's hard to balance these things and I'm still learning.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

My Sensitive Nose

I live with a smoker.  I'm not happy about it all, for many reasons, but seriously - I can't stand the odor.  It lingers on clothing and comes from deep within the lungs, something even a fresh mouthwash/toothbrush can't touch.  Sigh.  It's another one of those areas I cannot control, but must live with.

Monday, March 15, 2010

My First Confession

There is a lot about me that isn't perfect and I've thought of many things that I could list.  But, when I turned 36, I decided to give up Coke for the whole year.  For me, this is big - I was a daily Coke person.  Saturday, after almost a month Coke-free, I failed.  I had a Large Vanilla Coke from Sonic.  It was a weak moment.

I was embarrassed as a parent because of my son's behavior at soccer practice.  There on my own with two younger children in tow, my oldest refused to participate.  Nothing I could say or do would persuade him and his behavior was becoming more and more obstinate.  So, rather than battle it out in front of the other parents, I loaded everyone up to return home.  AND the van wouldn't start.  It was a low moment that ended in tears. 

So, I failed in parenting and in my Coke fast.  It happens.