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Thursday, June 24, 2010

Livid

H told my oldest son that I made the decision for Daddy to move out.  My sweet boy was told too much information for a little boy and it makes me so angry that this is how is was framed to him.  Yes, I was the one who finally drew the line and ended our marriage, but have I told our son how Daddy hurt Mommy?  How he broke his promises to Mommy and did things with other women that should have been saved only for Mommy?  No.  I am trying to protect the image of Daddy to my children and I don't feel like I get that same consideration. 

I feel glad that J is talking about this with me.  I know he must think about it and he hasn't shared much until this week.  "Why can't Daddy just move back here?"  "Can we all move to Daddy's place?"  "I liked it when Daddy lived here."  These statements just crush my heart and I didn't want this for my children.  I desperately wanted us to remain an intact family.  H made the choice when he looked outside our family in an attempt to fix the broken-ness within.  Now we all have to pay and suffer.  It is tragic and I'm so angry that we have to deal with it!