Turning The Page

Things are changing in my life, and that is never an easy space for me.  I feel it in the rhythms of a new job, another child moving to college, and even in the way my own body feels existing in a new decade of life. It's all so unfamiliar. I would love to be able to see around the bend to what this next season looks like, but I am only able to walk ahead with what I know for today.  

There have been tears, there have been smiles, and I wish I could name all the good that will happen. First I must simply live through the daily changes and navigate things one step at a time. Looking back, I must admit that my greatest growth and most significant joys have come through uncertainty. Letting go of control prompts resilience and wisdom as we grow through any struggle to identify who we are.

My dear husband reminds me that in the midst of what is changing, so much also remains consistent: our home, our family, and our commitment to one another along with our faith. It helps to remind myself that these things will be the same no matter what. These anchors provide stability in the winds of a new season. The values that ground me provide a foundation for curiosity and openness to something new and wonderful.

Some of the changes we face are brought by our choices, while others a decided by others. I recently chose to change my field of employment to an area where I feel great passion. I failed to anticipate the significant feeling of grief I would face in letting go. After almost twenty years of working for one company, it is more challenging than I anticipated to let go of the responsibility.

I have felt unsettled. Untethered. Unsure of myself. Uncertain. 

What if I fail? What if I don't find my way? What if this change brings more pain than joy? These fears, though powerful, are often rooted in our deep desire for stability and control.

I decided to leave and pursue a new opportunity where my passion and fulfillment took precedence. I'm so grateful for almost two decades with one boss, many familiar coworkers, and a very predictable schedule.  The decision stemmed from a deep realization that true satisfaction in life comes from doing what I love and feeling a sense of purpose in my work. While my former job provided stability, it served an industrial field more than people. In contrast, my new role aligns with my values and interests, offering a renewed sense of excitement and purpose.

Uncertainty is a feeling we all face at one point or another, so while it makes me uncomfortable I know it will not always feel this way. That sense of the unknown is the very path to new possibilities. Life is a path that takes us through so many transformations where we grow and change. Part of human existence is adjusting to what we encounter.

While my current season of transition is daunting, it is time to shift out of my comfort zone and into the fertile ground where I may flourish in a new and fulfilling way. Embracing changes and new seasons means embracing life itself, and that is my choice today!