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Thursday, January 26, 2012

In Life, You Count!



I hope I'm not losing my mind, but there are certain days when surely I'm close to it.  The immediate frustration of messess, homework, willful children and laundry piles just drive me to seeming madness.  Usually I get to this point when I've put myself at the bottom of priorities and the others in my life follow by doing the same. 

I need to value myself and treat myself with respect.  So do you.   You're not the only one who feels the madness of mommyhood.  Let's take acton and change course today.  It all has to do with
R-E-S-P-E-C-T.
  1. Know what you want, know what you need.  Good mothers put everyone else first, and we've usually done it for so long that we lose ourselves in the process.  It's okay, we do this to survive, to equip our children and because of our innate nurturing qualities.  But we exhaust ourselves managing everyone else's happiness, schedule, emotions and our own anxiety.  Drop the need for things to be "just so," or perfect.  It sucks the life out of you more than gets you to the place you desire of true joy.  So make a list of what you need more of, less of  and what you miss.  Here's mine: More - Time to read.  Less - interpersonal conflict.  Miss - feeling connected. 
  2. Be assertive about your needs and wants.  Why should anyone else make your needs a priority if you don't?  It's okay to tell your children you need some private time.  Schedule something to feed your sould or eliminate something that is causing undue stress.  Take action, don't just wish your way to repeating the same patterns. 
  3. Demonstrate self-respect and they will respect you, too.  Your time and life are important.  Martyrs do not good mothers make, so build some of that margin into your family routine.    Spend some time on something you love for nothing more than the pure joy of it: reading, photography, hiking are things I love and have done little lately.  Incorporate the family, if that works, but do it for you!  Plan a get-away without the children - I've got one on the calendar in June and I just can't wait!  The anticipation gives me something for which to strive. 
We mothers are doing so much for so many.  Remember, it's your life you're living!  Choose to invest in yourself so that you can give to others.  What can you do just for yourself today?

10 comments:

  1. Wow that was great,even though i'm not a women i'm a man the things you are saying make so much since i feel like your my Therapist Lol.You sound like a very stable Mom,Lady it's nice to have the point of view from a person going through the same things am I.Thank you for the message and may God bless you and your Children.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wow that was great,even though i'm not a women i'm a man the things you are saying make so much since i feel like your my Therapist Lol.You sound like a very stable Mom,Lady it's nice to have the point of view from a person going through the same things am I.Thank you for the message and may God bless you and your Children.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wow that was great,even though i'm not a women i'm a man the things you are saying make so much since i feel like your my Therapist Lol.You sound like a very stable Mom,Lady it's nice to have the point of view from a person going through the same things am I.Thank you for the message and may God bless you and your Children.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I so agree with what you said. The problem is sometimes we come to a point where we aren't really sure who we are and what we want. We spent so much time being mom that when it's over you look around and say now what? That is when I say....whatever you want. Now that my children are teenagers I think it is the perfect time to reconnect with myself and discover all I can be, besides a mom. And wow what a lesson for my kids.

    ReplyDelete
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  6. As a mommy to 3 boys, I totally agree. One of my 2012 resolutions was to start a blog so I could do something I really enjoy- write. It gives me that so needed 'me' time away from the chaos! Do drop by and check it out. I'll be certainly following your blog :)

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  8. muito bom o seu blog, não sou mãe mas concordo com o que você diz, você escreve muito boas dicas.

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  9. Nice blog, hi friend, i found that there is one website offering free puzzle games. Just take one minute to sign up then you will receive one free puzzle game. Its URL is http://www.684899.com/en/CosmicCreature/project_1.htm Click the below button of the page to get in. I've done it and now i am enjoying it. Would you like one?

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  10. I could totally relate to what your saying almost exactly. I actually just started blogging today. I have two children who are 14 months apart. I named my blog 14 months apart,The loving reality!So Im just trying to navigate my way through this blog world and I fell upon your blog. It is so well put together and girl,I know how you feel. This has been my struggle since I have delved into the world of motherhood.

    ReplyDelete